So it’s been a while. I still don’t know what to write about, I still don’t know where I’m going with my life, and I still don’t how to deal with it. I’m just gonna give this a try, to write something personal that won’t just end up among the drafts.
So I haven’t told you much at all about it, but I went to South Africa a couple of months ago. And the people I met there, came over here a couple of weeks ago. I found friends. Not just any kind of friends, but close friends. We really connected there and so we did even here. It’s friends that I want to see again but that I’m afraid I’ll lose. There’s so much distance and so much happening all the time even when I just sit here by my kitchen table doing nothing that makes our friendship harder to keep.
I’m scared. Scared that we’ll lose contact, scared of not being able to follow through with returning the when-we-meet-again-gifts we gave each other, scared to forget everything they taught me.
Maybe I’m just holding on to what I know, because they played(play) an unpredictable part of my life and I’ve got even more of unpredictable coming at me right now in my life. Maybe that’s why I’m scared.
Nevertheless, they mean so much to me and I hope I’ll never lose them. I hope all those words weren’t just an imaginable vision but words that will actually mean something in the future.
(I dared. You might not think of this as much, or even important but putting this in words means a lot to me.)
